The Tourist (**)
Directed by: Florian Henckel von Donnersmarck
Starring: Angelina Jolie, Johnny Depp, Paul Bettany, Timotthy Dalton,
Steven Berkoff, Rufus Sewell
Seen: January 7th 2011
** Out of ****
They say if it walks like a duck, swims like a duck and quacks like a
duck; it’s probably a duck. The Tourist had a trailer like a good movie, it
looked like a good movie, it even sounded like a good movie; but here’s the
thing: it isn’t a duck. It is an empty shell. Sure, Johnny Depp is entertaining
as ever and just as charming while Angelina Jolie is her usual beautiful and
charismatic self; but The Tourist is as vacuous as your popcorn box under the
seat after the movie’s done.
Elise (Jolie) is being followed by Scotland Yard, under the guidance
of the down-on-his-luck Inspector Acheson (Bettany). She is followed so
obviously closely in fact; that the guards manning the surveillance truck
driving about 10 metres behind her wherever she even walks (really, they might
as well have the whole team just walk with her) discuss whether she is wearing
any underwear today. We also see a man (Sewell) hanging around the peripheries wherever
she goes, and we start suspecting.
The authorities are this close to Elise in a last-ditch attempt to
capture her former lover, Alexander Pierce, who leaves her a note telling her
to board a train, and pick someone of his height and build and make everyone watching
believe that this unfortunate soul is Pierce (this works because no-one knows
what Pierce looks like, having had extensive reconstructive surgeries). She
picks the bumbling Frank (Depp), an American math teacher on a European
holiday; and he is so attracted to her he immediately stumbles after her pretty
much wherever she goes. But Pierce also stole a lot of money from the very
dangerous Reginald Shaw (Berkoff), a powerful criminal who has insiders at
Scotland Yard as his handle on trying to find Pierce. So when Elise shows up in
Venice flaunting her new fake-Pierce, both Scotland Yard and Reginald Shaw
redirect their efforts and go after Frank, who stumbles through attempts on his
life and attempts to capture and (occasionally even) sell him, all in a big run-around
to the eventual revelation of who Pierce is.
The Tourist was filmed in the beautiful city of Venice, and if the
city didn’t have an advertisement before, parts of this movie can be used for
that. The music very obviously attempts to create a silly, light-hearted mood,
and comes of as annoying and intrusive more than supporting. Jolie and Depp met
for the first time during the making of this movie, and they are fine with what
they’re given script-wise, but I’ve seen both of them do much better. The story
is a mess from start to finish and with its uneven pace the movie struggles to
keep the viewer fully engaged, making it seem at least once that the story is
more intricate than it actually is; and lastly, there is never a real sense of
dread/fear as the action just doesn’t reach levels that demand it.
So that is that then, The Tourist is surely a shiny shell, but that
shell is mostly empty.
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